Author: Flatkatsi

Email: flatkatsi@optusnet.com.au

Status: Complete

Category: Drabble Angst

Pairings:None

Spoilers: Stargate the Movie. Children of the Gods.

Season: Pre Season One

Rating: G

Content Warnings: None

File Size: 22kb

Archive: Incoming Wormhole

Summary: Thoughts on a loss too hard to truly comprehend.

Disclaimer: Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.

I ache.

It is a deep ache, down far inside. It is an ache that can never be removed, never dismissed, never forgotten.

Never discussed.

It is the ache that is brought on by total devastation, by utter loss. How can anyone survive an ache such as this? I know that I do not have the strength to.

I thought that I was strong, invincible.

Untouchable.

Sure Ð things had happened to me. Dreadful things.

But nothing like this. Nothing that couldn't be fixed.

This can never be fixed.

I don't take photos any longer. I don't want to tempt fate. Why bother when things can be gone so quickly? So finally.

I don't go to church any more. Why would I? I still believe in God, but I don't like him. Why would I worship a god that could let something like that happen?

I don't plan for tomorrow.

Tomorrow might never come.

Sometimes I wish that tomorrow would never come. That I could live in yesterday. But I can't. I'll never be able to. Yesterday is as hard to live in as tomorrow.

How can I continue? What could possibly be worth remaining for?

There is an ache so deep inside that it can never be removed. It may be hidden. Paved over. But it will always remain. The most fundamental part of me.

I ache.

The End